Saturday, October 04, 2003
I haven't posted in a while. It's been a long week, and I ended it by sleeping for 14 hours. It would have been an impressive stretch if I hadn't been woken up last night by a drunken friend from high school, who I've rarely talked to since. It was actually an amusing conversation, since she was too drunk, and I too sleepy, to have any coherence.
It seems that my mind has a way of letting me know when I've been asleep for too long, by bombarding me with messed up dreams. This morning, I woke up after an intense dream of being stuck in some kind of video game, fighting the devil's pet with a curved arab-style sword. The devil's pet was a very abstract sort of creature, that took on whatever physical form it wanted to at any given moment. In our final, desperate round, it chose to assume the form of a giant apple pie that would simply grow bigger every time I clobbered it with my blade. I realized all was futile when it grew to the size of a small garage, and ran away.
If I were a superhero, my superpower would be having strange dreams.
Every morning, I wake up, hit the alarm clock, and after a while start my day with the pledge to learn something new and interesting, and possibly even grow a little. As for the former, the atomic physics I've been reading is interesting, but I'm not sure if I've done anything to the effect of the latter... forcing myself to do overdue laundry, I'm afraid, doesn't count. At times, it seems like that kind of a thing isn't something to be measured in the units of days.
I see a lot of Panna these days. I wonder why she is so unwilling to acknowledge that the human bonds she forms with those around her are important to her, in any way other than the superficial. She tells me that she enjoys being with David, sleeping with him, cleaning her house and doing her laundry with him, but that in the end he does not mean anything to her. It's frustrating in a way, being a friend to somebody who is so cold and distant towards everyone.
I spent some time this afternoon talking to Paul. It's unfortunate that such a bright and funny man is so shy that very few will have the chance to appreciate him for who he is. I don't know if I was successful at all in cheering him up; it's hard to change what somebody is thinking about at the moment, and even harder to change their brain chemistry.
It seems that my mind has a way of letting me know when I've been asleep for too long, by bombarding me with messed up dreams. This morning, I woke up after an intense dream of being stuck in some kind of video game, fighting the devil's pet with a curved arab-style sword. The devil's pet was a very abstract sort of creature, that took on whatever physical form it wanted to at any given moment. In our final, desperate round, it chose to assume the form of a giant apple pie that would simply grow bigger every time I clobbered it with my blade. I realized all was futile when it grew to the size of a small garage, and ran away.
If I were a superhero, my superpower would be having strange dreams.
Every morning, I wake up, hit the alarm clock, and after a while start my day with the pledge to learn something new and interesting, and possibly even grow a little. As for the former, the atomic physics I've been reading is interesting, but I'm not sure if I've done anything to the effect of the latter... forcing myself to do overdue laundry, I'm afraid, doesn't count. At times, it seems like that kind of a thing isn't something to be measured in the units of days.
I see a lot of Panna these days. I wonder why she is so unwilling to acknowledge that the human bonds she forms with those around her are important to her, in any way other than the superficial. She tells me that she enjoys being with David, sleeping with him, cleaning her house and doing her laundry with him, but that in the end he does not mean anything to her. It's frustrating in a way, being a friend to somebody who is so cold and distant towards everyone.
I spent some time this afternoon talking to Paul. It's unfortunate that such a bright and funny man is so shy that very few will have the chance to appreciate him for who he is. I don't know if I was successful at all in cheering him up; it's hard to change what somebody is thinking about at the moment, and even harder to change their brain chemistry.
